The Art of Going to Bed

I once heard a Pastor say that the trick to keeping a strong marriage was only 2 things – 1. Love God  2. Sleep naked.  Writing that makes me want to have t-shirts made with that slogan.  Love God & Sleep Naked.  But I digress.

What happens when you get married?  If you aren’t careful you can fall into a rut.  Before you know it you have a roommate, not a spouse.  Why?  Because you fail to set priorities to connect.  I always counsel in my pre-marital appointments to PRIORITIZE time together.  Set a date night.  Find time to just be together – without the kids, dog, iPhone, iPad, or iAnything.

One way you can accomplish this is simply by going to bed together.  I didn’t realize how unique it was to do this in a marriage.  We didn’t know any better!  Jennifer and I have always gone to bed at the same time.  But undoubtably, the night owl marries the ‘early to bed and early to rise.’  You are polar opposites trying to do life together.  But this simple act of going to bed together does a few things:

  • Promotes conversation.  I know I’m always trying to fall asleep and Jennifer decides to tell me her whole day.  But wives NEED this time to share.  Now you’re a captive audience.
  • Prevents separation.  I think it keeps you from becoming roommates.  Separation is not really great for a marriage, despite us saying that ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder.’  Continual absence does not, however.
  • Protects purity.  There’s too much crap on TV now.  And if you are like most people you don’t have the computer in the bedroom.  Going to bed together keeps each of you from looking at smut while the other is asleep.
  • Prompts intimacy.  Its kinda hard to be ‘together’ when you’re not together!  I’m going to refrain from being too descriptive here.

I think this is one simple revolutionary idea that could really transform your marriage.  I know it requires a change in schedule.  But just commit to it and create a regular routine.  And start doing life together – including sleeping.  That whole naked thing is up to you.

1 thought on “The Art of Going to Bed

  1. Excellent and we’d give the same advice! Our ministry is dedicated to helping marriages through our own struggles -Married with Jesus, lost our way, divorced, returned to Jesus and He restored our marriage to better than ever! 2015 we will celebrate 40 years together – with a slight break in service!
    Attended Lifepoint today, April 6, 2014 and heard you preach. It was excellent, solid in the Word and God was glorified throughout the service!
    So glad we shared in the whole experience!
    We are travelers but will be back whenever we’re in the area!

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