Wow, think I need to change this to the 'IVF Blog'.

Anyhow, went and had an ultrasound this morning – with a 15 month old present.  Fun stuff.

The result was the Dr. was able to see a yoke sack.  He was happy about that.  The IVF Nurse said she didn't think that was going to be the case.  Haha.  Everyone was very encouraged.  The only thing he didn't care for was the presence of a hematoma, which will probably be passed in the near future.  The plan now is to do regular ultrasounds and track the growth of the yoke sack and start looking for the actual baby.  Her hCG levels may just be low, or the baby has genetic defects and that is resulting in the low numbers.  So the regular ultrasounds will be the determiner.  My take – we're pregnant, let's move on.  I'm tired of living like this.  I'm just going to accept the fact that in 9 months I'll be losing more sleep than I do now.

Next ultrasound will be next Thursday.  Thank you for your continued prayers!

Ugh.  I have a prediction.  9 months from now we'll still be going back to Charlottesville to see if we're pregnant.  Then we'll push out a baby….or Jennifer will.

Levels went up, but not enough for their liking.  They don't seem to happy about it.  And neither are we.  Feel stretched thin.  But the good thing is they are calling us in tomorrow morning for an ultrasound.  Finally.

Please pray!

Unless your just strange, you like change – at least a little bit – or at least when it comes to seasons.

I'm so excited that fall is here!  I'm actually wearing a long sleeve shirt this morning!  Soon I'll be wearing a jacket.  Then I'll be dressing Wyatt up like a pumpkin.  Then I'll be stuffing my pie hole with…what else…pumpkin pie.  Yes, this must be my favorite time of the year.

Keep praying!  It's working!

Numbers Friday – 379
Numbers Today – 783

That's a 62% increase over a 2 day period.  Praise GOD!!!!!!!!!!

The nurse wants her back in on Thursday because they'd still like to seen the numbers higher today than they were.  But I'm thrilled with them!  She told me to keep our fingers crossed.  I told her nonsense.  Don't need to when close to a thousand people are praying for the same thing!

Excuse my language but this bites.

So here is the update – in detail.

Monday HCG levels – 288
Wednesday HCG levels – 272
Friday HCG levels – 379

That is only a 40% increase from Wed to Friday.  We needed to see a 60%-100% increase.  The nurse said this are the possible explanations.  Least likely is an ectopic.  Less likely is we lost a twin and kept the other.  Most likely is that it is a failed pregnancy.

So I'm holding onto the less likely option.  Please pray like never before and beat down the door of heaven!  Enough of us praying and we can cause a good disruption up there!  We want to see a huge jump Monday!  Oh yea…we have to wait again until Monday. 

I've been frustrated.  I'll admit.  Over the past couple of weeks I've been on an emotional roller coaster.  I've yelled at God.  I've cried.  I've laughed (only while watching Jim Gaffigan).  I've been thankful (every time I come home to Jennifer and Wyatt).

But last night Jennifer and I prayed together.  And the prayer started like this, "Dear God, I have some mixed emotions towards you right now, and I need you to hear us."

Steven Curtis Chapman's wife said this after their daughter died, "I don't want to be an example, I want my daughter back."  I'm there.  I don't want to be an example.  Neither does Jennifer.  We just want a baby.  But we are examples whether we like it or not.

So here is the example I want to set.  I think its ok to be upset.  To ask questions.  Pray as a couple.  Cry.  Laugh.  Be honest.  Don't be fake.  Don't bottle up your emotions.  I'm going to be the last person to pray, "Oh father, thank you for all of this struggle we are going through.  It is such a blessing."  But we ultimately must trust – hard as it may be.  And for me it has been difficult.  I have all sorts of thoughts going through my head.  But I will always be honest with God.  And I will work through the frustrations.  And I will voice my struggle with Him.  I'm sure he can handle it….He's God.

The nurse called and the HCG levels did not change.  Which is not a good sign. Still in the 250's where they were Monday.  Meaning?  Another 2 days of torturous waiting.  Have to go back Friday to do the blood test again.  They should have doubled, or at least risen.  One explanation is that we lost one of the babies and the level has plateaued.  So here is what we need to pray:

God, we need these levels to rise like they should! Let this pregnancy be successful! Give us peace!

Sorry for the gap in posts.  Let me explain why!

Admittedly, this has been a rough few days for us.  Over the past week, Jennifer has been experiencing some slight cramping.  Friday we had a scare.  Then Saturday we had a big scare – won't go into details.  Monday we took a pregnancy test which said we're pregnant – silly because that same day we were driving to Charlottesville to get an official blood test.  That too said we're pregnant, but hard to be excited with the scares we are having.

The next step was to go back today and get the same blood test – which I am currently waiting to hear the results from.  They will either say that her levels are going up – good; or they are going down – bad.  Either way, it's hard to breathe – and will be so until we get an ultrasound to find the reason for the cramping and blood loss. 

So please keep praying.  On my end it's hard to be optimistic.  So I need the faith of the rest of you to help us out!

We like watermelon.